we're alone again

i've been back in la for about 24 hours now and i've already managed to spend like $200, $14 of which was for parking that i was too lazy to get validated. i hate myself. i bought a new dress that i will probably only get to wear a few times for special occasions. it's stupid how many of those dresses i have. maybe if i got to go on some dates they would be put to good use.

my bags are all over the floor of the living room and it looks like they exploded open. luckily meg luvz me and never gives a shit about anything annoying i do.

i have been gone for 2 weeks and i haven't seen j in like a month or 2 and i still miss him. this sux. i just wish i could find someone else with the same scent and the same soft hair. it's so disappointing to love everything about a person, from the way they smell to the way they talk their job to their talents, but they turn out to be so bad for you all along.

i fucked up last night and it made me realize that you can't make it work with someone you really like, no matter how great they are, if it isn't the real thing. this isn't j, this is someone else who will remain nameless.

oh well. there are more important things to worry about in life. like finding a new job and planning my fabulous cocktail picnic birthday!